You’ll see it when you believe it: A visualisation technique to own your power

‘Get out of my head! This is my time, you annoy me enough at work, how dare you interrupt this beautiful yoga class.’

It was the end of my weekly yoga class, lying in vinyasa, trying to let go of the week’s work stress and BOOM! There she was, my work frenemy, who I’d been butting heads with all week. She’s been taking her stress out on the whole team in the most negative ways and bringing the whole vibe of the office way down.

‘No, I won’t let you invade my peace and quiet now, you have to leave.’ But she just kept popping back, louder and louder.

‘Fine. Mind, if you want to think about HER go for it, I give up!’

What happened next was unexpected and so freeing…

I had a dreamlike vision, maybe I fell asleep, who knows. I saw myself holding a black box, and passing the box kindly as if I was presenting a gift, to the same work colleague who had been driving me crazy seconds earlier. And then it was done. My body and mind flooded with peace as I released any tension I had with my teammate.

I had this immediate knowing that it was okay, it was more than okay, to give her problem back to her, for her to deal with. I saw the way I had been accommodating her bad behaviour out of compassion for her stress, I’d just been taking her foul mood swings without a word to her and allowing a vicious cycle to affect the whole team. By blaming everybody around her she had given up all power to fix the problem. It was my job to give her problem back to her, because that is were her power lay, that is where she could attack the problem at it’s core. I had to call her out, and it could be done in love rather than in angst.

I had to share this expanded perspective on conflict because it blew my mind. It’s like when people say ‘What you don’t own, own’s you’. By taking responsibility for the good, the bad and the ugly in our lives we call our power back. By owning our flaws, our mistakes and wounds we heal ourselves and gain new strength. If we fight or reject our shadow sites we only prolong the suffering.

Next time you’re struggling with an undesirable reality or unexpected situation try and imagine that discomfort in a box. Take a few deep breaths and envision yourself taking the box, or the problem, confidently and calming, with two hands. Send a message to your subconscious that you’re going to own this gift and take your power back.

Make art not war.

Your Friend,

Buzzy